Why Spiritual Abuse is So Powerful and Wicked

[updated 10/8/09 - 10:15am]

I think “Spiritual Abuse” is a relatively new term.  We’re so used to defining a church as either a cult or not a cult. If a church is not a cult, then we say, the church has its problems, but “…at least they are not a cult.”

But if you think about it, the history of spiritual abuse really goes a long way – back to even the Pharisees.  They used their religious title and position to control and judge people, and to lift up themselves as self-righteous.  The position given to them as religious leaders was misused and abused for their own gain.

Gracepoint Berkeley clearly commits spiritual abuse.  I am not the only point of reference on this.  In this site, I have referenced numerous other resources, and many of them are on the links on the right.  You can even read over Characteristics of a Spiritually Abusive Church yourself as a litmus test.  I didn’t make them up myself.

Personally, I find spiritual abuse to be even more wicked than physical abuse. [I am not making light of physical abuse, but stating how serious I think spiritual abuse is].

People naturally have spiritual hunger.  I believe we all have a longing for God.  When spiritually hungry people find Christians who seem willing to help them get closer to God, they put their guard down, and they place A LOT of trust upon pastors or leaders of some kind.

They even dismiss a lot of their own thinking, because correctly so, the Bible teaches in Proverbs 3 that we should “trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding,” and Hebrews 13:17 speaks of obeying your leaders and submitting to their authority [Make sure you read this clarification on it however].  And so trusting in ones spiritual leader or guide seems to be the appropriate things to do.  The leader or guide practically represents God to them.

Things get very twisted, unhealthy and abusive when the leader then does not abide by the Word of God, but introduces EXTRA-biblical teachings as God ordained mandates.  Also, it’s terribly wrong when the leader refuses to acknowledge the full truth that he or she is wrong on an important matter, and refuses to apologize, and rather casts the blame back upon the trusting believers.  But people who have given their loyalty to their leader will blind themselves to any faults, and in this way, spiritual abuse is very powerful.  Spiritual leaders can have an amazing psychological control over their members.  [How do you think people end up following the odd and outlandish teachings of a group like Heaven's Gate?]

Additionally, it is downright wicked and ungodly when the focus becomes upon the leaders and the organization itself, rather than the Body of Christ as a whole, with Jesus being the Head and main character.

All of this happens at Gracepoint.

Gracepoint may DO many things in the NAME of Jesus, and have claimed to BE WITH Him, but we see in Luke 13

²⁶“…you will say, ‘We ate and drank with you, and you taught in our streets.’  ²⁷“But he [Jesus] will reply, ‘I don’t know you or where you come from. Away from me, all you evildoers!’

What we claim about Jesus doesn’t matter, if Jesus himself says he does not know us.

Consider the older son in the Parable of the Lost Son that Jesus told in Luke 15.  The older son did everything right, and stayed and worked in the Father’s house, but in the end, did not understand the Father’s heart.  It was ironically the son who physically left, and returned that understood the Father’s heart.

The point of the story is about understanding and sharing in the amazing love and grace of our Heavenly Father.

If leaders in a church hurt and damage people through spiritual abuse, is that sharing in the Father’s heart?

If spiritually hungry people walk away from leaders in a church feeling less attracted to God, and almost even repelled and bitter at God because of them, is that sharing in the Father’s heart?

If leaders do not serve in humility, but dominate in hyper-authoritarian ways, is that sharing in the heart of Jesus, who washed his disciples feet, and told us to do likewise?

I grieve over people that ran away from God and remain in depression and even bitterness because of their experience with Berkland/Gracepoint.

I’m not exonerating everyone who went through Berkland/Gracepoint and left.  Mostly likely not all who left, have left hurt.  There were probably those that did leave “for the world” simply because they loved the world and had no interest in God in the first place.

But people’s relationship with God, and their eternal lives are at stake.  Spiritual abuse is an issue of eternity, not just the physical, and so I see it as truly wicked when leaders to indeed abuse their authority and harm God’s children.

Kelly Kang has often called talked about specific people being “so wicked” to her fellow staff members, or has rebuked people directly and called them “wicked”.  She doesn’t realize that while much of what she does is good indeed, the spiritual abuse she commits is completely wicked.  [Based upon her recent post, it seems however, that she sees herself as a sinless, blameless being who is above wickedness and is always right]

I place my hope upon the fact that God, however, is sovereign.  I pray that those of you damaged by Gracepoint are being healed by God and are being led back to Him.